How to win people over in business and in life!

I love my life!

That’s really how you win people over in any aspect of this wonderful and crazy journey!

Pretty simple? It is.

Every single person from every walk of life can feel and sense when someone is genuinely grateful, fun loving and focused. Take Sir Richard Branson, he an inspiration to many. Why? he loves life, his family, has an amazing sense of direction with his company and LOVES to share his enthusiasm and passion for whatever it is he seems to do. Now, I could say that his marketing people have done a great job with creating this image, but take a look at his pictures. Pictures don’t lie. They capture the true spirit of a person. It’s why tribes in some cultures won’t have their pictures taken. They believe it will capture their souls. And in a way it does. If we look at a Rockwell painting we see the same thing. The authentic genuine human experience. The eyes, the lines, the truth.

We can take so many genuinely successful people and attribute not only hard work but right attitude to their success. My 5 golden rules to winning over people and influencing situations are as follows:

1. Influencing others starts with us. As soon as you wake up in the morning say one positive thing. This is like an affirmation, but its not. When we are just waking up our subconscious is wide open and the mind is receptive. The minute we open our eyes the stimulation of our waking time, our conscious mind takes over and shuts down the subconscious and makes it harder to “program”. Doing this will put you on the vibration of what you asked for and bring people and situations of like kind into your day.

Before you open your eyes, place a message inside your mind and “program” your day. My favorite is “today is an amazing day, everything goes my way” (it doesn’t have to rhyme). I say that about 3 times take a breath and open my eyes. I have found my days to be very different to the days I do not do this. you can change the message in any way you like to suit what kind of day you wish to have.

2. Do something that makes you happy. cliche? it is, but everyone knows those people who are like “magnets”. When we do something that makes us feel good people pick up on that energy very clearly. It’s a strong energy and everyone wants to be a part of it. 

Make a list of things in life that inspire you and make you feel good. Do at least one or two of them a week or one each morning to start your day. For me mountain biking, art, the gym, cooking, reading, jazz, singing, going to the radio station. Those help to recharge my batteries and make me feel great.

3. Ask people about their interests and listen to what they are saying.Everyone likes to talk a bit about themselves. Don’t make it to personal, but knowing more about a person helps you to connect to them and puts most situations at ease. You can usually pick up little hints of what their interests might be throughout your conversation. If all else fails ask how they got into their line of business. Its usually attached to a story of friendship or camaraderie. Ask where they are from. These always ends up in some tale of travel and being the most fascinating conversations for me. 

Listen to what people are saying. Your body language will give you away if you are not interested, so don’t fake it. Don’t start the conversation to begin with if you don’t want to and don’t force it. Don’t lie to others and don’t lie to yourself. If you are interested make eye contact and keep yourself from crossing your arms, this closes you off and can seem intimidating.

4. Money doesn’t win everyone over. but how we perceive life does. Not everyone needs to know how much you make or what expensive item you recently purchased. My favorite people are those whose humility exceeds their ego. Don’t fool yourself though, there is such a thing as too much humility. It makes you a doormat for those people you would rather not attract. People who are takers. Those who leave you with nothing but a feeling of being drained. but ego and humility in the right balance will always make you interesting and attractive, and always have the right people come to your door.

Once after a meditation circle I drove a woman home from my group.  She was simple and quite unassuming. She wore jeans and very little makeup. A small cross and a dainty gold bracelet was all the jewelery she chose to wear. When we got to her home she pointed towards an iron gate that guarded a spectacular mansion. She invited me in for a coffee, but my expression of amazement must have given me away because she proceeded to tell me that she didn’t invite many people over often. she said they always seemed to change towards her after they saw the lifestyle she led even though it belonged more to her sons and husband than her. She was amazing! It turned out she was the CEO of a company that manufactured lawn products and was worth millions!

5. Be yourself, don’t try to impress. You can only fake it for so long. After a while the true nature of a person will always shine through, so better to start a relationship of any kind with honesty. Whether it is a marriage of business or of the minds or of a husband and wife, we must learn to bring ourselves truthfully to the table and let others do the same. If we do this we will find that our relationships last longer, become stronger and draw those to you who will always be by your side.

I don’t know if any of this is new to anyone, but there is always something new in everything even if we have heard it before. My hope is to inspire and empower and if this article helps then I have won someone over today, and have hopefully helped them in the process.

Until Next Time… Stay On Tune, And Stay Blogged In


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